Can I?

Waking up, till dusk

All the time I ask

Can I?

Can I push myself

To the place I want to be

Can I push myself

And set my soul free.

Ma’s smile and Dita’s lullaby

They gave me strength

To take strides in life

But now I somehow find self

On the edge of the knife

A knife I named “setback”

Makes me realise things that I lack

The desires grow strong when I think too much

As my hopes fly, my passion die

I tend to ask myself, Can I?

Can I be the one I want to be?

Just make them two happy,

Or maybe now three.

Four if truth be told,

I want them all to be proud of me.

Oh how do I tell ya,

they mean a lot

To see them with teary eyes

I dare not;

I smash, I scream, I laugh at myself

And I also cry

When fear strikes within I ask,

Can I?

What is it that I got to do

To get back where I started

A place that needn’t be comfort

But assurance of some sort

That I can take care

Of my precious ones

And give them all the joyful cry

Strength and peace, mental is I need

Before the body gives in

And the soul starts to fly

Because,

Waking up, till dusk

All the time I ask

Can I?

A mini social conundrum

I have come up with a very macadamized observation of the degrading emotion of humanity in us in today’s society.

Let me tell you how.
See when ‘self respect’ crosses it’s threshold it starts gathering a very negative form that is our ‘ego’. And this leads to many different waves of issues that may inturn compel us to be inhuman. That complicates the simple and fascinating thing called life.
Coming back to the macadamized example. Machines are our very own creation. Human beings made it. Fact. And yet are annoyed by the traits we put in it when building it. Isn’t it?
Layman example would be the ‘horn’ in cars.
The peculiar observation that I have had in today’s men is the fact that they take it on ego , the very insidious form of self respect I was talking about. Their Ego is Hurt if you beep it on them.In a small fucking blue dot in this universe.
Blows my mind away. Where are we even heading?
Fuck.

The Red Magician.

For those of you who don’t know who this guy is, this is Mr @phil.coutinho

A playmaker for Liverpool FC. We call him the magician. Not because he can do wonders with his left, right, centre whatever. But the fact that he has done it under immense pressure! After the dark transfer clouds passed away, he has given it all for the team. And the fact that a “mighty” club like Barcelona. A heaven of Footballing brain and skills. But a South American , of course. A Brazilian. Hence the affinity towards the big fishes of the Spanish league. I do not blame them. Understandable, but thing that we call unethical, is if being called upon, both on the connection between the two Clubs as well as on the player’s mind, having a family it affects Phil and them as well. The liverpool fans, as the real entourage of this Brazilian wonderkid they got from Inter under Rafa’s helm (Rafael Benitez), should always be embracing towards their own kin. Them. The players, yes sometimes issues like Lovren or the goalkeeper may frustrate you, but keeping in mind the pride they take from putting on that jersey, and the effort that Phil has given in professionally, I think the lad deserves some more love and respect , maybe be for one last time , before he leaves. Because he will leave. For sure. Just look at him play nowadays. Not just the “no smile, no joy” celebrations of late, but the swagger that has come into his play. No disrespect to Liverpool, but I think he has gone a level above just like Suarez did, and the lack of trophies again would a be a reason that will cost Liverpool another world class talent. Proven. But still more to come. But proven. Eventually he will leave and the fans should enjoy and cherish them just like we did with Suarez. I have a but.

But, if the lad needs to depart, in my opinion he should move under Zidane’s tutelage rather than the camp of Lionel Messi (No shots fired).

Just to screw with the Catalan based club.

The Voyage ~

Life. It’s like a game, you restart after you die. It’s like you respawn as a baby, learning, growing, living the game everyday. Having a real and not a virtual experience of air, water, food, emotions and thoughts.After honing the skills you become self sufficient. 

But a small twist my friend. The perceived twist it that unlike any computerised game we can mould our life as we like.  Or do we?

There is this small thing I have been thinking about. Life is not only experiencing the events of this fabric of universe but also to fulfill one’s own destiny. Ain’t it sport?  One who fails doing do grasps the cold arms of death. Just to be reborn again and witness and feel everything all over again. Just to realise that one tiny wrong step that might have deviated him from the path of his destiny.

We as human beings feed off each other to grow and survive. A very popular game called the clash of  clans is very similar to our life. The avatars, and the player grows by looting , and feeding on other players. Just like in life. Like in reality.

Speaking of reality, I believe death is even more real than life. Life is just a bubble of dreams, hopes, emotions that eventually bursts. When we talk about accepting reality, we never mean death , rather the materialistic things that are present inside the bubble. Acquiring resources from others to crank up our engine is what we do here. And then be a part of this chain, a chain where someone else will eventually feed on us. 

What is this chain I wonder? How are we in it after all? Who put us in this conveyor belt where if you detail from the destined path you come back , respawn rather, as a bag of meat and emotions to undo your mistakes. Whoever is successful embarks upon a remarkable journey of spiritual consciousness. I like to call this journey as “Voyage into the Void”. 

Intriguing right?  One mistake sets you on a different path but puts you back into this bubble. And you redeem yourself of that mistake, the soul has a chance to visit the void, into eternity.

THE ELEVEN

This one came from a Manchester United fan, who is a very good friend of mine:

“I have never seen this head hunting football from Liverpool ever. Brilliant stuff. We were lucky for the point.”

And being a good friend, he reviews the rivalry with sensibility and maturity. So I get really honest opinions and comments from him. So this was actually nice to hear, always from a big rival.

The match actually belongs to every Liverpool player. From Milly to Bobby To Mr. Ever so energetic Adam Lallana. Then there was the New Simon Mignolet as the guardian. Hovering over the post and protecting every threat in front of him bar the curse of luck in the end. 

There was this amazingly talented midfielder turned a defender. Alexander did his job with such heart that it took Mourinho to swap his ‘exciting‘ winger Martial with Mata. He gave an eye to Rooney, Mkhitaryan, Mr 89 million, the best player for United ,Herrera. 

1st goal? Oh Mr. Pogba! Handball. Penalty. Milner. Boom! 1-0! Deservingly ahead the Reds.And the fans erupted. There were moments after that when Manchester had chances. Pretty decent one. Second half was the half of Emre Can, the tank and the lil magician Coutinho. Stopping plays and space making respectively. Even though United attacked desperately in the 2nd half, the reds were resilient. Mourinho went back to what Van Gaal did. The Fellaini game where the devils relied on 2nd balls. And one moment was enough to bring them to level. Yes there was a dirty side to the game too, with Pogba pulling ,dragging and pushing Henderson, Herrera holding Firmino’s shirt as if it’s a street brawl but nonetheless it was indeed a derby of two big guns fighting for glory. 

Perceptions.

Back in early 2000s, whenever I used to you go out with my parents to have a meal and I see a girl singing inside the restaurant, people would always judge her and see her as a “bar girl” . There was always this negative image that got built in our minds.

And now , whenever we see someone performing in a cafe or a restaurant, she (basically) becomes a local.celebrity. I can say I am proud to witness the change in perception.

The atheist’s paradox.

A famous atheist once bantered God , explaining why doesn’t he bow down to Him. Why does he question and hate him. He says “bone cancer to 6 year old? Is that how you treat your so called creation?”

Well let me tell you something , if he doesn’t believe in or respect the existence of God, then whom is he actually blaming for the miseries man created for himself?

It’s a paradox, isn’t it?